Just imagine the scene.
Jesus was in Capernaum,
teaching in the synagogue.
He and the disciples
had returned from a hillside
where five barley loaves and two fish
multiplied
to feed over 5,000 men
(and probably a few women…)
This feast was so rich,
so abundant,
that 12 full baskets of fragments remained.
With the memory of that miracle still lingering,
with crumbs of bread still clinging to their robes,
with the smell of fish in the air,
the disciples still struggled to believe.
“My flesh is true food,
and my blood is true drink.
Whoever eats my flesh
and drinks my blood
remains in me and I in him.”
This saying is hard, who can accept it?
And so, many didn’t.
They walked away
They left.
They returned to their vineyards,
their farms,
their fishing boats,
their shops,
their crops,
their safety, comfort, and peace.
They walked away from the scorn of neighbors.
Away from difficult sayings.
Away from leprous beggars and bleeding women.
They walked away from cryptic stories
that turned life
upside down and sideways.
They walked away from risk;
away from Jesus and his heart-pounding,
pulse-stopping,
nerve-wracking,
habit of challenging everything
you thought you believed;
everything
you thought you knew.
They walked away.
And so,
they weren’t present in the Upper Room
to plunge their feet into basins of water;
to see wine became blood
and blood become redemption.
They didn’t keep vigil in Gethsemane
or hear the clink of traitorous silver.
They didn't stand beneath the cross
and see the skies darken
and hear the heavens weep.
They walked away
because the message was hard.
And because they walked away,
they didn’t feel their hearts burn
along the Emmaus Road
or see fire ignite at Pentecost.
They didn’t stand in the empty tomb
and experience a spark of hope so bright
it transformed darkness into light,
death into life,
and life into eternity.
Today in Cincinnati,
and Tulsa,
and San Diego--
wherever disciples gather,
wherever faith is challenged,
wherever the message is hard--
we confront this same choice.
This same decision these disciples faced
so long ago in Capernaum.
We can stay and face the hard message,
or we can walk away.
We can step forward,
or turn back.
Dealer’s choice.
We can walk
if it feels too risky.
We can leave
whenever we are mocked.
We can vanish
anytime our fellow disciples seem too demon-y,
too needy,
too odd.
We can hide
when commitments become burdens
and burdens become hard.
We can run in panic
when we realize the cross
always lies before us.
But something we should remember
as we turn to walk away…
Jesus remained.
Jesus remained.
He never faltered.
He never stopped.
He never forgot.
He never turned back.
He also heard hard sayings
and in response,
he opened his hands
and bent his back
and picked up his cross to walk towards,
not away from God’s plan.
Jesus asks us, “Do you also want to leave?”
Do you want to activate an escape route,
or will you stay to walk with me
towards,
not away from God's plan?
Despite our fears,
Despite our doubts,
give us the courage Lord,
to say with Simon Peter,
“Master, to whom shall we go?
You have the words of eternal life!”
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